After thoroughly enjoying reading Hannah’s teenage diary excerpts I decided to dig out my own. I was an avid diary writer throughout my teenage years (and am contemplating keeping one again.)

It was hilarious reading through them again, in particular the boys I liked and the things that I thought were major life issues at 16. Turns out they weren’t such major issues. At all.

Here are a few snippets for you:

Saturday 28th July 2001

We’ve just played Scrabble and Mum & Dad have just blatantly told Ben what words to put and where and they made allowances for him but not me. Could they hide their favouritism any less? they might as well have sat there and told me to fuck off. Anyway Mum has just come and told me I need to shave my legs – how dare she?! I’ll do them when I bloody well want to – not when I’m told to!

(This excerpt in particular had me and Jonny laughing at what a hormonal delight I clearly was!)

Friday 28th September 2001

I’ve just realised how much work I actually have to do and aargh!! I’ll never get it all done! I have loads of Textiles, about 6 pages of English & history, Maths past paper, R.E. coursework & science revision. I mean Jesus Christ our teachers are possessed by the devil and their mission is to kill us with over-homeworking. It’s soooo unfair! Boyf front is still empty but someone keeps ringing my mobile at 9.30 every night and much as I’d like to think it was A I unfortunately think it’s J. Urrgh!!

(There is part of me that wants to go back and give me 16 year old self a talking to about being so ridiculous. I feel a little perspective was definitely in order!)

Monday 26th November 2001

I read this article recently that journal writing is good as it releases tension. I think this is true as it helps me get off my chest things that I would never normally tell to anyone else. It feels good just to say them! Even if it is to a book! Apparently if you put more than one exclamation mark after something you find funny you’re laughing at your own joke. I don’t care. I’m going to carry on doing it anyway!!

(Such a bad ass with my double exclamation marks! I also love that the things I’d not normally tell anyone mainly consisted of boys I was ‘in love’ with, which of my friends were being unfair to me and whether or not my parents actually hated me! )

Sunday 3rd February 2002

It always seems to rain when I do my paper round! WHY ME?! Even though the weather was shit this morning I saw a couple going walking in their trendy cagoules and BIG walking boots – such a sexy image – I think not! Why would anyone choose to walk for fun? It’s bizarre!!

(This really made me smile as I’m now one of those ‘bizarre’ people who go walking for fun.)

Re-reading all my old diaries made me smile, and (in parts) almost cry. Part of me wishes I could go back and tell my 16 year old self that life won’t always be so riddled with hormones and that my family will become some of my closest friends. I’d also tell myself not to waste away the months wishing for a boyfriend! The time will come and it will be worth the wait!

There are still elements of my teenage self in me now though, I still get over-excited about puppies and cute animals; I still have a tendency towards the melodramatic and I still criticise myself more than anyone else does.

It’ll be interesting to look back on this blog in a few years to see how much more my life has changed.

Did you keep a teenage diary? How much have you changed?

 

When I sat down to write this post I didn’t think that a lot had happened in March. Then I looked back through my diary (turns out some things that I thought were February actually happened this month!) So here are my 4 highlights for this month (also, how is it the end of March already?!)

1: Finding the dress!!

I found my wedding dress this month. Just thinking about it makes me ridiculously girlie and excited. It met with the mothership’s approval and we’re now planning some customisation of it! I managed to find it on the high street, thus saving a small fortune  and meaning we’re not scared to take a needle and thread to make it unique to me! It’s now covered and hanging safely in my childhood wardrobe at my parents’ house. Previously it had been laid carefully out in our spare room with Jonny instructed not to enter into the room for fear of death!

2: Family meet up.

We went to a wedding fair last weekend at our beautiful reception venue and took the opportunity to organise a weekend when both sets of parents could meet up/get to know each other. I can’t think of anything worse than them being strangers on our wedding day. Thankfully it all went well and everyone got on (I think that the Saturday night wine might have helped this along…)

3: Romeo & Juliet ballet.

Every year my mum and I head to Leeds for the Royal Northern ballet’s annual March performance. As my birthday is in February this is always a birthday present. We made a day of it this year, with shopping and lunch in Leeds before heading to the show. It was incredible and made me cry. The end of Romeo & Juliet does this to me no matter how many times or ways I see it performed. What can I say, I’m a bit of an emotional wimp.

4: Daffodil based day out.

This weekend we went on a day out fuelled completely by my love of daffodils! We went to the National Trust properties Acorn Bank and Sizergh Castle, both of which were said to have daffodils in abundance at this time of year and we weren’t disappointed. Jonny got to learn about a restored water wheel powered mill so it wasn’t all too flower based!

What have you been up to this month?

I’m essentially an overgrown child at this time of year. I love the end of term. The prospect of the clocks going forward tomorrow night and getting a little more sunshine in the evening is something I cannot wait for.

The past month has been full on work wise. Lots of stupid paperwork (the part of the job I enjoy least) but a phone call to a friend last night helped me put things into perspective.

Everyone has days when they hate their job, when they’re exhausted and want to quit. Everyone feels overwhelmed and like they’re failing at times. And this is OK. It is completely and utterly fine. I definitely need to stop beating myself up quite so much when things aren’t so rose-tinted as I’d like them to be.

I’m healthy, and have a job and a wonderful set of family and friends. And I have a rather lovely man who buys me yellow roses to cheer me up because he knows how much I love them.

So, yeah, sometimes life is a bit shit. But for now, I’m looking forward to Easter and camping in Northumberland. That and having 2 full weeks off work to recharge my batteries.